Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Christian Bale Has More Fans Than Jake

Or at least that's how I'm rationalizing that Christian currently has 10% more of the popular vote than Jake in Entertainment Weekly's riveting Ultimate Male Hottie, 90's to Today Poll (rolls right off the tongue). The poll currently shows Jake as 6th behind Bale, Wentworth Miller, Clive Owen, George Clooney, and Johnny Depp.* Jake's "Ultimate Hottie Moment" (as chosen by EW): "Shaving in a car's side-view mirror, moments before meeting his soon-to-be-lover Heath Ledger in 2005's Academy Award-winning Brokeback Mountain." Seriously? Everything that happened in that movie and they chose the shaving scene?

The Competition:
Christian Bale, who is not releasing an album.

Wentworth Miller, who is not running for President.

Clive Owen, who does not look like Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

George Clooney, who does not have an attractive m-shaped hairline.
Johnny Depp, whom it is not possible to find an unflattering picture of (so Willy Wonka will have to do).

True, there are millions of polls every day of the week in which Jake loses (though not usually to Went!) and true, we here at Jake Watch almost always ignore them on account of online polling being subjective and lame on so many levels, but let's face it. When Jake Watch is the source of the news, the news must be pretty damned slow. Ergo, we're covering polling. Just consider it practice for the long months ahead of reporting political polls.

Closer in our future? The Rendition Publicity Blitz! Check back for more appearances, but as far as we know, Jake will be on David Letterman October 15th, Live with Regis and Kelly AND Conan O'Brien October 16th and The Daily Show with Jon Stewart on October 17th (*live blogging alert*). He'll also be entertaining the Brits with Jonathan Ross on October 12th (as previously reported), and is scheduled to appear at the Rome Film Festival on October 21st.

Jake Watch is offering an "I'm stalking Jake!" button FREE OF CHARGE to anyone who asks Jake about his new album and/or his Presidential campaign. Dave, Regis, and Jonathan, that includes you. We'll even pay for shipping. Stewart and O'Brien, I realize you already have buttons, but who wouldn't want one more?

*OK, so in the three hours that this post was sitting completed but not published, Depp dropped down the list and Jake moved up to 5th. Such are the complications of writing on such dynamic subject matter!

40 comments:

Cherita said...

Oh, boy, so Jake has moved up past Johnny now? How exciting!

I totally agree on the poll thing. All these polls generally demonstrate is whose fans are the most interested in online polls.

I've been bitterly disappointed by a lack of coverage of your track listing, PG. I think that wench Nat Portman stole your limelight by signing on for Brothers. ;)

Love the button giveaway idea. Any one of them would be genius to take you up on it.

Becky Heineke said...

I just realized that I may have to sweeten the deal for Conan since we sent him 5 buttons right before Jake was on his show the last time...did we ever tell you guys we did that? Jon Stewart got 5, too. And both got a personalized card from JW congratulating them on landing an interview with Jake. Nobody does more crazy shit that doesn't get any attention than us!! :)

And yes. Damn that Natalie Portman. And damn "real" Jake news!! ;D

Anonymous said...

and on Regis the 16th

Becky Heineke said...

^^^ Thanks! I just updated. :)

Sam said...

wow Portman now too... interesting!!

I just dont get the johnny thing.. *waits for the stones to be thrown* And i just dont get the Jake not being number 1 thing ever. LOL

-sorry im a bit deluded this morning. Facing a 14 hour day on my feet at work *sigh* Id rather stay at home and read about PG's made up news al day... ;)

Anonymous said...

Is there gonna be a premiere in Los Angeles?

Anonymous said...

I think Jake has beaten Wenty right down to the ground in this poll.
92% of the vote, and the poll closes in three hours?!! Way ta go Jake!!

Online polls are the shiz!

Anonymous said...

I actually enjoy watching Christian Bale act quite a lot and happen to find him very attractive, but he could never compare to the beauty that is the Gyllenhaal. What's up with this list anyways? The age differences in the contestants are astounding, Jake should win on youth alone...Clooney and Depp are past their prime in the looks department and I've never understood the Wentworth Miller thing, he does nothing for me and Clive Owen is just blah.

BirdGirl said...

Okay, I admit I like Clive. But none of these men can hold a candle to Jake.

Way to go PG on sending buttons to the talk show hosts. One of them needs to recognize your hard work.

cina said...

Well, you have to agree that shaving scene is pretty hot eh? ;)

And can I just say that Christian Bale rocks? Okay I just did.

Anonymous said...

Jake Watch is offering an "I'm stalking Jake!" button FREE OF CHARGE to anyone who asks Jake about his new album and/or his Presidential campaign. Conan, Dave, Regis, and Jonathan, that includes you. We'll even pay for shipping.


Interestingly, the BBC have pretty standard email addresses for all employees, be they the tea lady or a well paid man, who's currently sporting some strange facial hair (that's Rossy BTW) so if enough of us emailed him about Jake's Presidential campaign, there's a chance it could get asked about(and may be better then my effort about 'does he smell nice, and what does he smell like')

heddaparsons said...

I always hated these stupid polls. I do think that Clive is hot, but not as hot as Jake!


PS: JAke will be on the Jon Stewart Show on October 17th!

Cherita said...

Clive Owen definitely does something for me, as does Ewan McGregor, but no, they don't hold a candle to Jake. Nor does Johnny Depp, who appeals to me in a different way--he does interesting things, like his work with Tim Burton.

Glad to see you've been updated on the Regis and Kelly and Jon Stewart appearances. We really are going to have Zodiac Week, Redux. The only way I could be more excited is if I were going to be in those studio audiences. Yay for the Hollywood promotional machine!

Anonymous said...

PG if you need an unflattering photo of Johhny get a screen cap from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas- ewwww- never an expression previously associated with the gorgeous Mr Depp.
Seriously he is the only one to hold a candle to Jake. Clooney has amazing eyes but standing to the much taller Tilda Swinton at a recent press do he looked like a monkey (sorry George but it is true).

Clive Owen and Christian Bale- OK. Wentworth Miller nooooo!

Jake is the hottest. Ever. Period.

Anonymous said...

OT:

http://www.lemonwade.com/2007/10/03/gyllenhaals-broadway-plans-on-hold/

Looks like we won't be seeing Jake on broadway anytime soon.

Becky Heineke said...

Interestingly, the BBC have pretty standard email addresses for all employees

So what's Jonathan Ross's??? Or how do I find it? I'll write him. Gladly. I have no shame.

Anonymous said...

Jake will be on Daily Show w/Jon Stewart on the 17th!!!

Becky Heineke said...

^^^ Yeah, got that. Look up a few comments and also it's on the main page. ;)

I'm guessing this is it?

jonathan.ross@bbc.co.uk

OK, I'm going to write him. Anyone else who writes him...hell, I'll give you a button, too. :)

Anonymous said...

Oops, sorry, PG. I was just so excited about a Jake and Jon reunion that I posted without looking. My bad. :/

Becky Heineke said...

^^^ No worries! :) I must admit I was uber-excited when I saw that this morning myself!

Linna said...

Competition!? *hmph* Not likely!! :D Loved the criteria used for ruling the others out, we all know they ain’t got nothing on Jake! (for, like, SOOOO many reasons)

And yeah, the shaving scene…? OK, so hotness goes on there, but I can think of a few other things that, IMO, would be more accurately labelled “UHM”. Some of the scenes in Jarhead, perhaps? But maybe that’s just me, preferring showering Jake to shaving Jake…?

Anonymous said...

I have a suspicion there will probably be some kind of big screening, tho not necessarily a red carpet thing, for Rendition in NYC right around the time of Letterman. On what do I base this? Nothing....except, I have a free pass to a sneak preview screening of Rendition on October 15th right here in the good ol' Midwest, which Jake will not be attending.
Other actors have stopped by Letterman on their way to their premieres. They even come all dressed up. Will JW have Jake in 08 posters outside the Letterman show? Or the Daily show? Or Regis & Kelly?

Wonder if Jake will talk about memorable Halloweens again with Regis and Kelly...or if he will surreptitiously glower at Kelly with smoldering, lust laden eyes like he did that one time fleetingly.

BTW:If the campaign's budget will support it, I would be perfectly willing to attend the Rome Film Festival and promote Jake in '08 in Rome....for the absentee voters, of course. And also bcz I think the Italians would want to also vote for Jake for the American president...how could they not!

I think all the crazy Batman fans were voting for Christian. And I love Christian. But he's not Jake. Not even Johnny, who I adore....is Jake. Nor Clive. Not George either. The thing is, these polls are so lopsided when Jake is included it makes no sense. All these other people are really gorgeous. Someone loves them. But like someone wise said: There's Jake. Then there's everyone else. So it was unfair to even include him. Bcz people feel sorry for the others and tend to over compensate.

Anonymous said...

Sorry for the double post, but I just had a thought. Would it be possible for JW to give out buttons to the audience members as they file in? Just for fun? And somehow let someone from the show know ahead of time there will be people with these funny badges on?

Anonymous said...

Anon 10.40am here - sorry, forgot to post the flaming email address first time, they're all pretty standard, the only one I know of that isn't like that is Danny Baker's (London based media type person) and he uses Margaret.Rutherford@bbc.co.uk for reasons best known to himself.

They do work, email Mr Baker many times and got through to him, I'm currently composing my 'how does Jake feel about his Presidential bid' in an effort to sound slightly more coherant after my 'what does he smell like' one

BirdGirl said...

One of these people needs to ask him about Jake in 08. It would be way better then some of the predictable shit they always ask.

If we can get Jon Stewarts attention I’m sure he would ask him about it.

Anonymous said...

Is there anyone in the UK that's going to be able to get the Jonathan Ross Show on to their computer and over to the lovely and wonderful Stephanie? Y'know how good she is about sharing all the Jake shows :)

Only one day left to set this up peeps! Sorry I don't have any UK connections.....

Cherita said...

Email sent to The Daily Show. No idea if Stewart will ever see it, but it can't hurt. I used the taunt that Jake's campaign posters are far sexier than the Stewart/Colbert ones. :P

Anon 5:18, why is there only one day left? Jonathan Ross is going to film on 10/11 and air 10/12, I thought. Give us an update if you have it. I personally do not receive any UK stations, unless you count BBCAmerica. :)

Anonymous said...

JR's interviews do normally get uploaded to youtube fairly swiftly BTW

Becky Heineke said...

Cherita!! Did you just go to The Daily Show website?? I'll write him, too! ;D

10.40, that is awesome. I wrote wrote Jonathan Ross earlier this morning. So fingers crossed! And yeah, 5.18, we've got over a week...right???

bobbyanna, I once had a dream that we would sell enough t-shirts to sponsor a stalking trip. Sadly, we haven't made enough even to pay for a bus ride to New York (well, maybe a one-way bus ride). So, er, no trips to Rome. BUT.

ANYONE who is going to any of these things, feel free to e-mail me (prophecygirl@jakewatch.com) and I'll mail you shit to give out. Maybe I should post that at some point...

Cherita said...

Nah, I got the address from The Late Night TV Page, which is also the source of half of our upcoming Jake appearance info. I still might write to Conan and Dave, but with them, you know, there isn't the whole campaign competition thing going on, so it might not be very compelling.

Becky Heineke said...

^^^ Ah ha! I totally did not know those were there. Thanks. :)

Anonymous said...

anon 5:18 here, sorry about that, I'm a little over-eager it seems.....

Cherita said...

Update! Ellen DeGeneres, 10/18! I'm so excited I just may puke. This is shaping up better than Zodiac Week. I'm gonna be walking on a big stupid fluffy cloud for five days.

Becky Heineke said...

^^^ Goddammit! I just finished the schedule! :D OK, I'll update...and MAN he is going to busy!

BirdGirl said...

Oh my God! I am so excited! This Jake Week looks to be even better then the last one.

Xenia said...

Bobbyanna wrote : "BTW:If the campaign's budget will support it, I would be perfectly willing to attend the Rome Film Festival and promote Jake in '08 in Rome....for the absentee voters, of course. And also bcz I think the Italians would want to also vote for Jake for the American president...how could they not!"

Oh Bobbyanna... of course we Italians will want Jake to be President of United States, and the whole Universe!!! :))

PG, I'll send you an e-mail to make my stalker duties accomplished...;)

Anonymous said...

I might have to call in sick so I can see Regis and Kelly and Jake. I want to see if Jake "looks" at Kelly...like that.

Ellen is West Coast, isn't she? So maybe an opening event for Rendition will be in H'wood.

I am sorry we cannot afford the fare for Rome Film Festival!!!! LOL! There was a time I could have prevailed upon a benefactor for such assistance. Alas! those days are lonnnng gone.

Wet For Went said...

*singing* Went is wiiiiinning...
*whispering* I still love you Jake

Anonymous said...

too bad for Jake

www.pcwebsite.net said...

To my mind everybody have to glance at it.