Seeing as how it's Sunday and all. And what have we here?
Aw, look! It's Jake when he was young and adorable, but adorable in a different way than he's adorable now. Those of us who have been brushing up on our Jake History (which should be all of us, ahem) know that this little gem came from Jake's guest appearance on "Homocide: Life on the Street" back in 1994.
Seeing this picture makes me sad because it makes me realize what a waste Jake's career became after this. Here, he had the start of an absolutely brilliant career in television laid out in front of him, but he threw it all away to become a quote/unquote "award-winning" quote/unquote "movie star." Ugh. Like Brokeback Mountain has anything on "Full House."
So I decided to do a little investigating to see how much Jake really gave away for his quote/unquote "film career." Turns out a lot. I made a list of roles that could have been Jake's if he'd just stuck to the TV thing and not run off to Movie Land like a baby.
A. Seth Cohen on "The O.C."
Charmingly gawky and yet oddly endearing, Jake could have been bringing us melodrama at its finest week after week. Plus, then I would be able to join the league of Cohen enthusiasts because the actor who played Seth would not be someone who looked disturbingly like my brother.
B. Ryan Wolfe and/or Eric Delko on "CSI: Miami"
I couldn't really decide which role Jake would be best in but then I realized, this is Jake! Duh, he would totally play them both! I even figured it out plot-wise: Wolfe and Delko could be, like, identical cousins who both got into forensics and moved to Miami separately but were, like, totally freaked when they wound up working together! Think of the hijinks!
C. "The Daily Show with...Jake Gyllenhaal?"
I would so watch every night! Oh, wait. I already do...
D. Special Agent Seeley Booth on "Bones"
I realize probably none of you watch this show. Hell, I don't even watch this show. I just wanted to see what Jake's head looked like on David Boreanaz's body.
E. Jim Halpert on "The Office"
Um, need I even explain this one? Emmy gold, people. Gold.