Aaah, we meet again, Seagull of Malevolence. I could assume that this is an act of revenge designed to make me glowing nuclear green with envy...but no, I'm not that self involved. I realise the world doesn't revolve around me. It obviously revolves around Jake Gyllenhaal. I can see this is merely a case of BLATANT STALKING.I can accept that this is in no way a retaliation to that time you flew into the back of my head on Aberdovey beach. Remember that? I am also going to make no connection between this and that time you sent one of your blackbird minions into my bedroom to scare the living fuck out of me which resulted in a trip to the A&E.
Nah. I'm cool. Just know that I hate you Seagull of Malevolence and I will seek my vengeance. Especially after this stunt.
23 comments:
This is CLASSIC!
Seagull of Malevolence
LMAO!!
ugh, i hate birds. seagulls, esp are such a nuisance, like flying rodents. i can hear them now...
"Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine!"
This reminds me of the scene in the movie where the kids are singing that song, the teacher looks out the window and sees ALL those blackbirds beginning to assemble on the playground for the assault.. there are millions...and then the children leave very quietly, except someone screams and the birds attack and the teacher gets pecked to death...they always seem to send one sinister gull ahead for recon...I'm worried....do they have these things on MV?
Hey,remember the bird webcam?I think I miss it.
About seagulls in general,I like them cause I think they look poetic.However,this one in particular is more active and more involved than it should,so..dude,keep the distance!
Seagulls are nothing but rats with wings. How dare they approach The Sex and The Father of The Sex in such a disrespectful way???
;-)
TBL, I had a similar experience with a great blue heron, a bird which is three feet tall. You can only imagine that horrors that go along with a bird of that size. I realize now it was the bird community trying to stop me from my future work as a Jake Watch agent, but I would never have known were it not for this post. Excellent work, brits!
LMAO!!! Brilliant. :-D
i read that the denise richards-richie sambora balcony photos were taken by paparazzi posing as DIVERS, so they had no idea they were being stalked. i was like, WTF, they hire divers for this stuff now? what's next, seagulls? indeed, is that a blinking red light i see in the beak? agents, we have some serious work to do to guard the gyllenfamily from these evil birds!
My God, will the handsomeness never stop? Despite the informal situation, Jake looks almost professionally posed in a deliberately casual stance, partly turned away from the camera. The pictures from this little family outing could have been used to sell outdoor clothing. ("Mr. Gyllenhaal is wearing our All-Weather Squall jacket with pima cotton lining (p. 2) and our cargo pants (p. 11) in Light Tuscan Olive.")
As for the seagull, it's fallen victim to interspecies infatuation. Now it's going to want Jake to become a seagull, too. It's wondering: Why are Jake's publicists lying, saying that he's human, when deep inside, he's really avian? The seagull is standing vigil, watching & waiting for the day when Jake holds a press conference & comes out as a bird. (Like in the movie "Birdy.")
Personally, I love seagulls. But they look better in flight than when doing anything else. They have perfect aerodynamic design.
I accidentally ran over a pigeon yesterday - does that help the cause?
Most definitely, katie. I love animals but birds must fucking die unless they're like parrots that can talk.
katie, omg, that's like the seinfeld episode? anyone know what i'm talking about?
Phoebe is so right, this one is CLASSIC, britpop! You need a "best of" category, and this one should definitely be in it! ;)
Funny you should say that, dkbb. I've just spent a good proportion of my time and sanity collecting all the 'blatant stalkings' together. They look all nice and pretty under 'Features'.
And a best of you say? Hmmm...
I hate going to downtown in my city, near the port where there is a plague of doves everywhere, thanks I'm not a spy target.
I love you guys and I love these posts, but where is Jake? :(
Honestly, that seagull is working for me. I trained him, just as I trained Atticus. LOL! ;-)
"not wolves ...rather da woofves."
dtanks you.
Whatever became of that group from down under "Flock of Seagulls"?
Still around and touring.
http://www.oz.net/~davester/AFOS/
Now that some 80's hairstyle -
http://tinyurl.co.uk/koya
Last night I had a dream in which I chased remote controlled sea gulls and now I see this....it's a sign! (but a sign of what?)
A dedication from the oldies radio station in honor of this picture of Jake G. with a seagull.
"Why do birds suddenly appear
Every time you are near?
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you."
oh my god!! I am LMAO at all of these posts. :->
Speaking of Seinfeld, remember the one where a bird flies into Elaine's giant freak head? Jake's head is kinda big. Maybe the seagull is plotting an attack on Jake's head.
LOL! Now, that's just too funny! :p
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