Thursday, August 03, 2006

MY LAWYER IS A GOD SEND

I'm going to retire to my boudoir now but I have to give a "special mention" to Jake Watch 's lawyer, joycedavenport for finding this article:

BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN star Jake Gyllenhaal says the way to a woman's heart is to cook her a romantic dinner - or to do a STRIPTEASE.
He told Bravo magazine: "If I meet somebody, I always show her my real face straight away.
"Fresh produce is the most important ingredient when you try to win a woman's heart.
"Only then does cooking for two become an intimate pleasure.
"I'd cook loads of pasta, tasty vegetables and lamb's lettuce with tomatoes."
However, he added: "If I could impress her with a striptease, I would."


For the love of all things holy...

Source

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

:::thud:::

Ok Jake question: would you be wearing an apron during the strip tease?

Kitchen stripping is just a wee bit dangerous...you know hot oil and all....

I think he should try it out on me first...purely for safety reasons of course ...

Anonymous said...

Hasn't he also said that cooking magazines are like porn to him?

He needs his own cooking show, he could combine the two. I'd upgrade my cable to watch it.

perfectscore_goldstar said...

*sigh*

thoughts of that is the things dreams are made of ...

but I agree, kitchen stripping is dangerous.

Jake? Why don't we take it to the bedroom instead ... :)

blackhatnbeard said...

Awww come on...let the boy strip wherever he wants. Lets not be picky!

claire said...

Does he really honestly have no idea whatsoever???? Has jake turned into Mr Thicky from Thicktown?

"If I could impress her with a striptease, I would."

If? If?? How can that man even begin to doubt his abilities to get to my knic....er, heart by wondering if taking his clothes off would do the trick.

Note to Jake - stop trying to be modest

msdonniedarko said...

what i would way rather have a strip tease than dinner!!! lol

Anonymous said...

Yep, that'd do it for me totally - a man showing me his real face, cooking for me and then....showing me his lovely body. Jake knows how to please a woman ;-)

Anonymous said...

And I forgot to add that helping a man cook could be fantastic foreplay.

~DKBB~ said...

Oh my, that might even distract ME at the moment, fires or no! Come on over, little Gyllenwolf, and give it whirl! ;)

For those of you so inclined, you can catch up on the fire news at Musings on the Journey.

dani said...

Jake has to know he's no slouch in the looks dpartment. But I believe that he seriously doesn't have a clue as to the extreme effect he has on people. Like Claire said, as if there is any doubt that he could impress with a strip tease... It's remarks like this that make him sooooo appealing.

moonbeams said...

I think that movie, 91/2 Weeks must have made as big an impression on Jakey as it did on me! I'll never look at a strawberry the same way! But I have to agree! Given a choice between cooking, fresh produce, or whatever, and Jake stripping for me? Honey, you can eat anytime...but first things first....

gin said...

"If I could impress her with a striptease, I would."

Aaw...that "if" thrown in there is so cute. As if it's even a question!!

And now, with the striptease image in my head...I faint. Bye.

britpopbaby said...

A strip tease with fresh produce? Swinging a couple of turnips around his head as he shaked his ass?

JoyceDavenport said...

^^^Goodness only knows what he would have in place of the santa hat...a nice bunch of carrots perhaps?

( BTW Glad to be of service bpp).

Anonymous said...

*faints*

WHAT a man.

nice anonymous said...

Jake's People: There's this magazine that's doing a little feature on the way into a woman's heart. Why don't we give them a quote? It'd be good exposure for you.

Jake: Ummm, I'm kind of busy right now.

J's People: They just want a couple sentences.

Jake: [Musing.] How do I strike the right balance between utter sincerity and sexiness without sounding smarmy?

J's People: Just be yourself. If it's a little incoherent, we'll tweak it for you. Do you want to say something about your cooking or something like that?

[And so, in just a few minutes' time, a little sound bite or quote is conceived that will follow Jake around on the Internet for years afterward -- sometimes benignly, sometimes not. Sometimes he'll have been half-joking, but it will sound as though he'd pondered its wisdom in a cave for a week before opining. In this instance, I'm not gonna complain. The image of Jake as a literally naked chef is a pleasant one.]

JoyceDavenport said...

He did say he liked to think of himself as the Jamie Oliver type of cook - keeping it simple- just a few fresh vegetables nicely arranged...

Ivy said...

I don't think all the stripteases in the entire frickin' world could match the intimate pleasure to be derived from Jake's tasty vegetables.

Simon Agent 002 said...

The idea of Jake needing to try to impress anyone is quaint.

britpopbaby said...

Lambs lettuce doesn't actually do a lot for me...oh wait, I see you what you did there.

nice anonymous said...

@ Ivy, you bad thing

Are you speaking of Jake's carrot, by any chance?

You know what they say about fresh, home-grown produce.

Ivy said...

Yes, nice anonymous, I know exactly what they say about fresh, home-grown produce. I imagine that Jake's vegetables would be carefully cultivated, lovingly prepared, full of flavour and packed with vitamins.

If only I could include Jake's carrot in my 5-a-day.

Honestly, if he didn't come out with comments like that I wouldn't have to resort to writing this stuff.

nice anonymous said...

I am NOT going to post about carrot juice.

I am not. I am not.

I'm just giddy with Friday-ness.

only1annabel said...

After the santa hat action we witnessed in Jarhead you just know that striptease would be a goodun! Wow be still my beating heart!

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